AWARDS SHOW MANIA: Video Music Awards

Three words:

BEYONCE IS PREGNANT!!!!!!!!

WOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not only is this going to completely revolutionize maternity fashion,

but it means a BABY is on its way!

AND I LOVE BABIES!!!!

Also-

Katy Perry just celebrated her 65th birthday,

Nikki Minaj went as a Holographic Harajuku Whore with the Bird flu,

Jessie J showed the world how to make an injury a fashion statement,

Demi Lovato was rocking some seriously rad eye makeup-

and she gave Joe Jonas a hug.

Can't you just hear her thinking,

"THANKS FOR BREAKING UP WITH ME

AND THEN GOING ON TOUR WITH ME

AND THEN BRINGING YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND ON TOUR WITH US,

JERK JONAS.

By the way, I noticed your purity ring is gone!"

Why is he even at the VMA's anyways? Everyone knows Justin Bieber is the new JB!

Speaking of which,

The Biebs showed everyone his snake.

Who he has named Johnson.

HAHAHAHAHAHA that dirty boy...

but lets be real,

WHO CARES?

BEYONCE IS PREGNANT!!! AHHHHHH! BEYONCE IS PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!

Oh the world is a wonderful place.

<3

Claire

AWARDS SHOW MANIA: GRAMMYS

HAY so I know the Grammy's were a week ago,

but school has been beating me up.

What I love about the Grammy's is how totally strange everyone dresses.

They aren't trying to look red carpet ready, they are trying to attract attention,

and since Lady Gaga stepped onto the scene, things have been even more Buckwild.

Here we go!

Nicki Minaj

it appears that marie antoinette married frankenstein...

and got cast in the Broadway revival of Cats

Ricki Martin

What else would he wear but metallic silver pants?

Shake your bon bon baby.

Cyndi Lauper

aka Draco Malfoy's hooker grandma

Rihanna

so THIS is how one dresses up for Christmas Barbados...

Hayley Williams

proving once and for all that orange and pink do not go together...

how much does she look like one of Cher's cleaning appliances?

Justin Bieber

(in WHITE VELVET)

looks just like an adolescent Colonol Sanders

I want some chicken.

Katy Perry

going full glitterati mermaid:

in a sparkle bra and a shiny table cloth,

and with wings that make it look like she farted a cloud...

It feels like this was created by a 4 year old

Snooki

a toned down, more elegant version of her hair,

classy makeup,

and a sexy dress that still leaves her covered...

I'm impressed!

not crazy about the silly shoulders,

but I'll take what I can get

Selma Blair

Maybe I just love baby bellys,

but this Lanvin dress is beautiful and looks so comfortable

I'm not quite sure why she was at the Grammy's though...

Florence Welch

This is the most beautiful dress of the night.

Handcrafted Givenchy Haute Couture,

it is stunning and different-

just like Ms. Welch herself.

(click HERE for more information on this incredible couture collection)

Now I know you all wanna know my opinion, so here it is:

I'm so over Lady Gaga. Girl, you bore me.

I'm not even going to post a picture of you.

Its like, whatever you crazy costume doll-

Showing up at the awards show in a Land Before Time status egg,

tryna be all innovative...

Honey, its been done.

For anyone who ever watched Nickelodeon's All That

Li'l Embryo and Li'l Fetus were entertaining in incubation 14 years ago

"Yo yo yo yo EMBRYO!"

You want weird and shocking?

Check out THIS South African Group

I apologize for the delay-

THE OSCARS ARE IN A WEEK!!!!

<3

Claire